Saturday, December 01, 2007

Note to some:

Raking leaves in a veritable hurricane is ill-advised. Quite ill-advised.


Note to the obnoxious lady down the street who lets her dogs poop in my yard:


Beep and keep your delinquent offspring out of my pond too, you entitled bitch beep.
Note to my sinuses:

I hate you.

Beep beep.
Note to PPF:

This is NH. That is a very real possibility.

Beep beep.
Note to Mitt Romney:

Seriously? Just in case the entire state went mad?

"The campaign of former Massachusetts Gov. Mitt Romney, the Republican front-runner in the state, said it locked all of its New Hampshire field offices and ordered staff to be on alert."

Beep Beep

Friday, November 30, 2007

Note to Hillary Clinton:

We don't like you in New Hampshire.

Beep Live free or die mothafucka! Beep.
Note to Angels' GM:

Not only did you just get played, but even the guy you signed knows he took you to the cleaners. Have fun paying him $16 million per year for his age 37 and age 38 seasons.

Beep This almost makes Tom Hicks look like a savvy baseball owner... almost Beep

[Ed:Yes, I updated the punctuation. And before either LizMc or Jen called me out about it.]

Thursday, November 29, 2007

Note to my liver:

We are making a beer bottle Christmas tree this year. You have been warned.

Beep Beep.
Note to KQ:

I thought the idea was to create one of those using only beverages consumed on christmas eve?

Beep Beep.
Note to the Miller family:

Work on this before Christmas eve.

Beep and pour me another rockstar beverage Beep.
Note to Boston Hipsters Addendum:

Actually, please don't make out at all during my morning commute. Please.

Beep Beep
Note to Boston Hipsters:

Please do not wear a black hat, long black coat, and full beard on the T, or I will assume you are an Orthodox jew and be totally freaked out when you start making out with some blond girl next to me.

Beep Espcially coming from Brookline, this is a resonable assumption Beep

Wednesday, November 28, 2007

Note to FHSIII:

Just as useless as regular Brian! Seriously, haven't they heard of wikipedia?

Beep When FCster moves to Boston, can I make him my personal martini making robot? Beep.
Note to Frazzled Holiday Shoppers (tm):

Ah, but do they have the Cleveland edition?

Beep Nevermind, I'll do it myself beep
Note to Future Parents:

If we're going to be combing catalogs found in the backs of seats, we might as well invest in our children's futures while we're at it.

Beep thank God there is a sport for middle-sized white boys Beep
Note to Frazzled Holiday Shoppers:

I do believe this would make the perfect gift for any of our nerdy friends. Including me. And Pam.

Beep R2, fix Brian a god damn martini Beep