Friday, January 05, 2007

Note to Pam:

To be fair, I did add your new cellphone number, and since I dragged my ass into work for the first time this week, and because I never check my home email from here and can't actually remember the password, I couldn't look up your home number.

Also, although we like to pretend otherwise, anyone who is super bored could read this blog (not just Liz' mom/sister/cousin/can't remember).

Beep Beep.
Note to Self:

Memorize cell phone number. It is extremely embarrassing to have to look it up in your own phone every time you need it.

Beep Beep
Note to Brian,

While I'm highly offended that you don't yet have me on speed dial (and pretty certain I put you on the mass blitz I sent out with my new cell and other contact info), here are my numbers:

Cell: 646-761-9122
Work: 617-867-1312
Home: 617-505-5878

Beep Beep
Note to all:

Someone get me Pam's number so we can up that percentage.

Also this is the first thing I thought of when I heard no-pants subway, though maybe Liz was referring to a personal experience of riding the subway with no pants. I'm also partial to their mission of dressing vaguely like Best Buy employees and invading a store.

Beep Beep.
Note to the technologically ept:

So far fully 1/3 of the participants to this blog have left me voicemail messages on my home phone that I have not been able to access. Will someone please come visit and set up my answering machine?

Beep I think I am a secret Luddite Beep

Thursday, January 04, 2007

Note to Liz:

No Pants Subway Ride? Do tell.

Beep Beep.

Wednesday, January 03, 2007

Note to Mr. Huizenga:

Since you asked the press for suggestions and advice, and we all know how dumb they can be, I'm suggesting myself.

As my first move. I will hire the Boise St. coach as offensive coordinator/assistant head coach, and the Boise St. offensive coordinator as defensive coordinator.

Beep Beep.
Note to Matty Y:

You're better off without Saban. Especially if he decides to take Malarky with him. I am hopeful, though, that Heizenga* will instead elevate Mikey Malarky to the spot of head coach. And then bring in Gregg Williams as the defensive "guru." Heh heh heh.

Beep *I made no attempt to look up how to spell Owner Wayne's Name Beep
Note to Sky:

Since you failed to reveal the location of the small orange cone to me, I decided to remind everyone of your previous losses in the cone war by posting this shot. It's one of my favorites, though not as cool as the time Yurgie made you think I was somewhere on Dartmouth's campus...

Beep Beep

Tuesday, January 02, 2007

Note to FireCrotchestarians:

I heard a little story on Bob Lonsberry's radio show today. It seems that Mrs. Elliot Spitzer was treated to a garbage plate at Nick Tahoe's when she was in town many months ago (presumably during daylight hours and accompanied by every NYS Secret Service agent on retainer). When she returned right before the election, she demanded to be taken back. The plates impressed her so much that the inauguration yesterday included garbage plates cooked by Rochester locals. The "real" caterers warned that they wouldn't have to make too many plates, but at one point the line was 60 people deep. Best First Lady ever.

Beep So pissed I didn't stay awake yesterday Beep
Note to Boise State:

You are now my favorite football team.

To expand on Doug's post, not only did they sack up and go for the win, they did it on the motherfucking statue of liberty play, after which the tailback proposed to his cheerleader girlfriend.

Beep Beep.
Note to Boise State Head Coach, Chris Petersen:

Thank you. Thank you for defeating the jack-ass Oklahoma Sooners, and for sacking up to go for two and the win in the forst overtime. I was inspired by the audacity. The Grillmaster probably also supports your decision. Unlike Denver's decision to play for OT instead of the win. I believe that they are now at home, having been bounced from the playoffs.

Beep I actually turned it off after the Adrienne Peterson 25 yd TD. Ooops, my bad. Beep

Monday, January 01, 2007

Note to Heroes everywhere:

(PC or Mac) + plastic guitar + USB connector + Frets on Fire = ???

Check It Out

Beep Happy New Year Beep